18 // MALAYSIAN // Space to nag

Tuesday, May 8, 2012


Okay, right now I just wish someone would calm me try to make my chin a bit up. Hello, nobody? Hm listen self. Just myself.

I had never feel this terrible. I guess, I was cut up everyday every moment. People around just dont get the idea. Nevermind. She, her words knock me. Then I was silent. That suddenly. Someone seems noticed by asking "Waa, whats wrong? You supposed to yell every morning" then answered with a lie, "Nothing. I just looking at the plane" this, I feel a bit cherished :') But no matter how, the silence make me think. Think so hard till my heart cry inside. Nobody know. I never want anybody know. Again, I lied. Hey, of course I want someone to lend his/her ear for me. But I trust nobody.

I sit, walk with silences. Keep thinking. Why this life is getting harder? My feelings turn out this way. Habitually, if there something wrong I will shut my mouth up for a mins, an hour or.......hm it just takes less than half day. Im feeling like nobody runs me. Even a little thing couldnt let me stay rest. That sometimes I wanna let him know, but the timing isnt right. Nevermind. I dont spoke directly that I was hurt. And those people dont need to ask for the forgiveness.

I need to isolate myself. Sit in a place where I can be alone. Just me and tears. I swear. Sorry self. I just put so much pain recently. I put a lot of laugh in order to hide them. But believe me, I could be better. I hope so, future will come fast and fade this all away. So for tomorrow I have a Mathematics test. All the best, self. Goodnight

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